5 Ways To Establish Boundaries In Friendships

Boundaries are an important part of social relationships - friendships, romantic relationships, familial relationships, relations with fellow peers and social relations with work colleagues. However, for many of us, establishing boundaries is something that we find very difficult to do, and this can mean that we are susceptible to poor interpersonal relationships.

Friendships are an important part of our lives, but establishing boundaries - and maintaining them - is essential for healthy, happy, respectful, fulfilling and positive friendships. Here are five ways to establish boundaries.

1. Know your limits

Establishing boundaries is all about knowing where to draw the line and understand what you will and will not tolerate from others. We all have aspects of ourselves that are off-limits. We all have things that we like or dislike. We all have personal values that mean so much to us that we simply can’t compromise on. We all have moments of vulnerability and things that we find to be quite sensitive. Knowing yourself and understanding your limits is about understanding yourself and making sure that friends you have to understand that there are certain lines that they shouldn’t cross.

2. Know your worth

The ability to establish boundaries is strongly connected to your self-worth. Those who have low feelings of self-worth tend to have the most difficulty in establishing boundaries. Knowing your worth, valuing yourself and having high levels of confidence and self-esteem will all help in establishing boundaries in your friendships and knowing what not to tolerate.

3. Be assertive

Learn to say no and stand your ground. Even if you are good at establishing boundaries, there will always be people who will test you. Your friends might be the most well-intentioned, but there will be times in a friendship where you will have to say no. Saying no to others means saying yes to yourself.

No is a complete sentence!

4. Practice

Be consistent. Establishing boundaries in friendships takes time and a lot of practice. Every now and then you might ‘slip up’ but as long as you keep on trying, maintaining your boundaries will become easier over the course of your friendships.

5. Consider alternatives if all else fails

Unfortunately, there are some ‘friends’ who are simply unwilling and/or unable to respect your boundaries no matter what. If you have exhausted all other options then the best thing to do is to keep your distance from them. Friends who refuse to respect your boundaries are disrespecting you. Those ‘friends’ are not worth your time, effort or energy - you deserve better than that.